Step 80 - Leadership, relationships and partnerships.......
This week I learned a valuable lesson in an important relationship. A business associate, who is also a friend, had a very different understanding about a course of action concerning the business. We both experienced physical and mental "shock" when we realized we were on very different paths.
Having been inspired by this person for a number of years and, she by me, I felt insensitive, selfish and unappreciated all at the same time. Fortunately we both took a big breath and recognized that our partnership both in business and as friends is important. We worked it out by individually processing, being honest about how and why we had gotten to the misunderstanding and confusion, with no blame or accusation attached.
Our path to health and wellness is very much impacted by the relationships we have with ourself and with others. Family, personal, professional and romantic relationships can and do have a bearing on how we respond to different situations, which, when I write it, sounds obvious However when we are in the midst of a crisis or just a day that isn't going well we may not consider the relationship as a root cause.
When we behave responsibly for our actions and the choices we have made we inspire others to do the same - its a wonderful process of sharing and everyone wins. The more generous I am with my time and resouces, the more I get back, without even trying. The less critical I am of others and the way they do things means I am less critical of myself and others are too.
The workplace, school and home can and is a wonderful resource for improving and developing relationships - and of course there are toxic and seriously abusive environments that we need to avoid at all costs. I for one have quit more than one job on the basis of an unhealthy environment - either values or the relationships between co-workers and bosses.
If you're experiencing dis-ease in your relationships consider what has to change - maybe it's time to move on or to address the issue head on. The first step starts with you.
For more serious problems - check out the following resources:
Exercise - step 90.
1) Make a list of people who are important in your lifeand who make you feel positive and healthy. Remember all relationships have sticky patches. Across the page write down the qualities that you like and admire about those people.
2) Create a list of your own qualities and see how they match up with the people who are important to you.
3) Now make a list of people you have a relationship with and who do not leave you feeling positive and healthy. Write down what you can do to change this. Consider if that person is someone you could cease contact with and what the potential benefits/negagtives would be.
Create your list of successes and challenges for the week.